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第9章 the ntriu jug frg f cavera cunty(第1页)

MarkTwain

Incomliancewiththerequestofafriendofmine,whowrotemefromtheEast,Icalledongood-natured,garrulousoldSimonWheeler,andinquiredaftermyfriend&aos;sfriend,LeonidasW。

Smiley,asrequestedtodo,andIhereuntoaendtheresult。IhavealurkingsusicionthatLeonidasW。Smileyisamyth;thatmyfriendneverknewsuchaersonage;andthatheonlyconjecturedthatifIaskedoldWheelerabouthim,itwouldremindhimofhisinfamousJimSmiley,andhewouldgotoworkandboremetodeathwithsomeexaseratingreminiscenceofhimaslongandastediousasitshouldbeuselesstome。Ifthatwasthedesign,itsucceeded。

IfoundSimonWheelerdozingcomfortablybythebarroomstoveofthedilaidatedtaverninthedecayedminingcamofAngel&aos;s,andInoticedthathewasfatandbald-headed,andhadanexressionofwinninggentlenessandsimlicityuonhistranquilcountenance。Herousedu,andgavemegoodday。ItoldhimafriendofminehadcommissionedmetomakesomeinquiriesaboutacherishedcomanionofhisboyhoodnamedLeonidasW。Smiley-Rev。LeonidasW。Smiley,ayoungministeroftheGosel,whohehadheardwasatonetimearesidentofAngel&aos;sCam。IaddedthatifMr。WheelercouldtellmeanythingaboutthisRev。LeonidasW。Smiley,Iwouldfeelundermanyobligationstohim。

SimonWheelerbackedmeintoacornerandblockadedmetherewithhischair,andthensatdownandreeledoffthemonotonousnarrativewhichfollowsthisaragrah。Heneversmiled,heneverfrowned,heneverchangedhisvoicefromthegentle-flowingkeytowhichhetunedhisinitialsentence,heneverbetrayedtheslightestsusicionofenthusiasm;butallthroughtheinterminablenarrativethereranaveinofimressiveearnestnessandsincerity,whichshowedmelainlythat,sofarfromhisimaginingthattherewasanythingridiculousorfunnyabouthisstory,heregardeditasareallyimortantmatter,andadmireditstwoheroesasmenoftranscendentgeniusinfinesse。Ilethimgooninhisownway,andneverinterrrutedhimonce。

"Rev。LeonidasW。H&aos;m,ReverendLe-well,therewasafellerhereoncebythenameofJimSmiley,inthewinterof‘49-ormaybeitwasthesringof’50-Idon&aos;trecollectexactly,somehow,thoughwhatmakesmethinkitwasoneortheotherisbecauseIrememberthebigflumewarn&aos;tfinishedwhenhefirstcometothecam;butanyway,hewasthecuriousestmanaboutalwaysbettingonanythingthatturneduyoueversee,ifhecouldgetanybodytobetontheotherside;andifhecouldn&aos;the&aos;dchangesides。Anywaythatsuitedtheothermanwouldsuithim-anywayjustso&aos;shegotabet,hewassatisfied。Butstillhewaslucky,uncommonlucky;hemostalwayscomeoutwinner。Hewasalwaysreadyandlayingforachance;therecouldn&aos;tbenosolit&aos;rythingmentionedbutthatfeller&aos;doffertobetonit,andtakeanysideyoulease,asIwasjusttellingyou。Iftherewasahorse-race,you&aos;dfindhimflushoryou&aos;dfindhimbustedattheendofit;iftherewasadog-fight,he&aos;dbetonit;iftherewasacat-fight,he&aos;dbetonit;iftherewasachicken-fight,he&aos;dbetonit;why,iftherewastwobirdssettingonafence,hewouldbetyouwhichonewouldflyfirst;oriftherewasacam-meeting,hewouldbetherereg&aos;lartobetonParsonWalker,whichhejudgedtobethebestexhorterabouthere,andsohewastoo,andagoodman。Ifheevenseeastraddle-bugstarttogoanywheres,hewouldbetyouhowlongitwouldtakehimtogetto-towhereverhewasgoingto,andifyoutookhimu,hewouldfollerthatstraddle-bugtoMexicobutwhathewouldfindoutwherehewasboundforandhowlonghewasontheroad。LotsoftheboysherehasseenthatSmiley,andcantellyouabouthim。Why,itnevermadenodifferencetohim-he&aos;dbetonanything-thedangdestfeller。ParsonWalker&aos;swifelaidverysickonce,foragoodwhile,anditseemedasiftheywarn&aos;tgoingtosaveher;butonemorninghecomein,andSmileyuandaskedhimhowshewas,andhesaidshewasconsidablebetter-thanktheLordforhisinf&aos;nitmercy-andcomingonsosmartthatwiththeblessingofProv&aos;denceshe&aos;dgetwellyet;andSmiley,beforehethought,says,&aos;Well,I&aos;llresktwo-and-a-halfshedon&aos;tanyway。&aos;

"Thish-yerSmileyhadamare-theboyscalledherthefifteen-minutenag,butthatwasonlyinfun,youknow,becauseofcourseshewasfasterthanthat-andheusedtowinmoneyonthathorse,forallshewassoslowandalwayshadtheasthma,orthedistemer,ortheconsumtion,orsomethingofthatkind。Theyusedtogivehertwoorthreehundredyards&aos;start,andthenassherunderway;butalwaysatthefagendoftheraceshe&aos;dgetexcitedanddeseratelike,andcomecavortingandstraddlingu,andscatteringherlegsaroundlimber,sometimesintheair,andsometimesouttoonesideamongthefences,andkickingum-o-r-edustandraisingm-o-r-eracketwithhercoughingandsneezingandblowinghernose-andalwaysfetchuatthestandjustaboutaneckahead,asnearasyoucouldciheritdown。

"Andhehadalittlesmallbull-u,thattolookathimyou&aos;dthinkhewarn&aos;tworthacentbuttosetaroundandlookorneryandlayforachancetostealsomething。Butassoonasmoneywasuonhimhewasadifferentdog;hisunder-jaw&aos;dbegintostickoutlikethefo&aos;castleofasteamboat,andhisteethwoulduncoverandshinelikethefurnaces。Andadogmighttacklehimandbully-raghim,andbitehim,andthrowhimoverhisshouldertwoorthreetimes,andAndrewJackson-whichwasthenameoftheu-AndrewJacksonwouldneverletonbutwhathewassatisfied,andhadn&aos;texectednothingelse-andthebetsbeingdoubledanddoubledontheothersideallthetime,tillthemoneywasallu;andthenallofasuddenhewouldgrabthatotherdogjestbythej&aos;intofhishindlegandfreezetoit-notchaw,youunderstand,butonlyjustgriandhangontilltheythroweduthesonge,ifitwasayear。Smileyalwayscomeoutwinneronthatu,tillheharnessedadogoncethatdidn&aos;thavenohindlegs,becausethey&aos;dbeensawedoffinacircularsaw,andwhenthethinghadgonealongfarenough,andthemoneywasallu,andhecometomakeasnatchforhisetholt,heseeinaminutehowhe&aos;dsbeenimosedon,andhowtheotherdoghadhiminthedoor,sotoseak,andhe&aos;earedsurrised,andthenhelookedsorterdiscouraged-like,anddidn&aos;ttrynomoretowinthefight,andsohegotshuckedoutbad。HegiveSmileyalook,asmuchastosayhisheartwasbroke,anditwashisfault,foruttinguadogthathadn&aos;tnohindlegsforhimtotakeholtof,whichwashismaindeendenceinafight,andthenhelimedoffaieceandlaiddownanddied。Itwasagoodu,wasthatAndrewJackson,andwouldhavemadeanameforhimselfifhe&aos;dlived,forthestuffwasinhimandhehadgenius-Iknowit,becausehehadn&aos;tnooortunitiestoseakof,anditdon&aos;tstandtoreasonthatadogcouldmakesuchafightashecouldunderthemcircumstancesifhehadn&aos;tnotalent。ItalwaysmakesmefeelsorrywhenIthinkofthatlastfightofhis&aos;n,andthewayitturnedout。

"Well,thish-yerSmileyhadrat-tarriers,andchickencocks,andtomcatsandallthemkindofthings,tillyoucouldn&aos;trest,andyoucouldn&aos;tfetchnothingforhimtobetonbuthe&aos;dmatchyou。Hefetchedafrogoneday,andtookhimhome,andsaidhecal&aos;latedtoeducatehim;andsoheneverdonenothingforthreemonthsbutsetinhisbackyardandlearnthatfrogtojum。Andyoubetyouhedidlearnhim,too。He&aos;dgivehimalittleunchbehind,andthenextminuteyou&aos;dseethatfrogwhirlingintheairlikeadoughnut-seehimturnonesummerset,ormaybeacoule,ifhegotagoodstart,andcomedownflat-footedandallright,likeacat。Hegothimusointhematteroffetchingflies,andke‘himinracticesoconstant,thathe&aos;dnailaflyeverytimeasfurashecouldseehim。Smileyaidallafrogwantedwaseducation,andhecoulddo’mostanything-andIbelievehim。Why,I&aos;veseenhimsetDan&aos;lWebsterdownhereonthisfloor-Dan&aos;lWebsterwasthenameofthefrog-andsingout,‘Flies,Dan&aos;l,flies!’andquicker&aos;nyoucouldwinkhe&aos;dsringstraightuandsnakeaflyoff&aos;nthecounterthere,andflodownonthefloorag&aos;inassolidasagobofmud,andfalltoscratchingthesideofhisheadwithhishindfootasindifferentasifhehadn&aos;tnoideahe&aos;dbeendoin&aos;anymore&aos;nanyfrogmightdo。Youneverseeafrogsomodestandstraightfor&aos;ardashewas,forallhewassogifted。Andwhenitcometofairandsquarejumingonadeadlevel,hecouldgetovermoregroundatonestraddlethananyanimalofhisbreedyoueversee。Jumingonadeadlevelwashisstrongsuit,youunderstand;andwhenitcometothat,Smileywouldanteumoneyonhimaslongashehadared。Smileywasmonstrousroudofhisfrog,andwellhemightbe,forfellersthathadtraveledandbeeneverywheresallsaidhelaidoveranyfrogthatevertheysee。

"Well,Smileyke&aos;thebeastinalittlelatticebox,andheusedtofetchhimdown-townsometimesandlayforabet。Onedayafeller-astrangerinthecam,hewas-comeacrosthimwithhisbox,andsays:

"Whatmightitbethatyou&aos;vegotinthebox?

"

"AndSmileysays,sorterindifferent-like,‘Itmightbeaarrot,oritmightbeacanary,maybe,butitain&aos;t-it&aos;sonlyjustafrog。’

"

"Andthefellertookit,andlookedatitcareful,andturneditroundthiswayandthat,andsays,‘H&aos;m-so&aos;tis。Well,what&aos;shegoodfor?’

"

"‘Well,’Smileysays,easyandcareless,‘he&aos;sgoodenoughforonething,Ishouldjudge-hecanoutjumanyfroginCalaverascounty。’

"

"Thefellertooktheboxagain,andtookanotherlong,articularlook,andgiveitbacktoSmiley,andsays,verydeliberate,&aos;Well,&aos;hesays,‘Idon&aos;tseeno&aos;intsaboutthatfrogthat&aos;sanybetter&aos;nanyotherfrog。’

"

"‘Maybeyoudon&aos;t,’Smileysays。‘Maybeyouunderstandfrogsandmaybeyoudon&aos;tunderstand&aos;em;maybeyou&aos;vehadexerience,andmaybeyouain&aos;tonlyaamature,asitwere。Anyways,I&aos;vegotmyoinion,andI&aos;llreskfortydollarsthathecanoutjumanyfroginCalaverascounty。’

"Andthefellerstudiedaminute,andthensays,kindersadlike,‘Well,I&aos;monlyastrangerhere,andIain&aos;tgotnofrog;butifIhadafrog,I&aos;dbetyou。’

"AndthenSmileysays,‘That&aos;sallright-that&aos;sallright-ifyou&aos;llholdmyboxaminute,I&aos;llgoandgetyouafrog。’Andsothefellertookthebox,andutuhisfortydollarsalongwithSmiley&aos;s,andsetdowntowait。

"Sohesetthereagoodwhilethinkingandthinkingtohimself,andthenhegotthefrogoutandrizedhismouthoenandtookateasoonandfilledhimfullofquail-shot-filledhimrettynearutohischin-andsethimonthefloor。Smileyhewenttotheswamandsloedaroundinthemudforalongtime,andfinallyhefetchedafrog,andfetchedhimin,andgivehimtothisfeller,andsays:

"‘Now,ifyou&aos;reready,sethimalongsideofDan&aos;l,withhisforeawsjustevenwithDan&aos;l&aos;s,andI&aos;llgivetheword。’Thenhesays,&aos;One-two-three-git!andhimandthefellertoucheduthefrogsfrombehind,andthenewfroghoedofflively,butDan&aos;lgiveaheave,andhysteduhisshoulders-so-likeaFrenchman,butitwarn&aos;tnouse-hecouldn&aos;tbudge;hewaslantedassolidasachurch,andhecouldn&aos;tnomorestirthanifhewasanchoredout。Smileywasagooddealsurrised,andhewasdisgustedtoo,buthedidn&aos;thavenoideawhatthematterwas,ofcourse。

"Thefellertookthemoneyandstartedaway;andwhenhewasgoingoutatthedoor,hesorterjerkedhisthumboverhisshoulder-so-atDan&aos;l,andsaysagain,verydeliberate,‘Well,’hesays,‘Idon&aos;tseeno&aos;intsaboutthatfrogthat&aos;sanybetter&aos;nanyotherfrog。’

"SmileyhestoodscratchinghisheadandlookingdownatDan&aos;lalongtime,andatlasthesays,&aos;Idowonderwhatinthenationthatfrogthrow&aos;dofffor-Iwonderifthereain&aos;tsomethingthematterwithhim-he&aos;searstolookmightybaggy,somehow。&aos;AndheketchedDan&aos;lbythenaoftheneck,andheftedhim,andsays,&aos;Whyblamemycatsifhedon&aos;tweighfiveound!&aos;andturnedhimusidedownandhebelchedoutadoublehandfulofshot。Andthenheseehowitwas,andhewasthemaddestman-hesetthefrogdownandtookoutafterthatfeller,butheneverketchedhim。And-

"

[HereSimonWheelerheardhisnamecalledfromthefrontyard,andgotutoseewhatwaswanted。]Andturningtomeashemovedaway,hesaid:

"Justsetwhereyouare,stranger,andresteasy-Iain&aos;tgoingtobegoneasecond。

"

But,byyourleave,IdidnotthinkthatacontinuationofthehistoryoftheenterrisingvagabondJimSmileywouldbelikelytoaffordmemuchinformationconcerningtheRev。LeonidasW。Smiley,andsoIstartedaway。

AtthedoorImetthesociableWheelerreturning,andhebuttonholedmeandrecommenced:

"Well,thish-yerSmileyhadayallerone-eyedcowthatdidn&aos;thavenotail,onlyjustashortstumlikeabannanner,and-

"

However,lackingbothtimeandinclination,Ididnotwaittohearabouttheafflictedcow,buttookmyleave。

中国古代哲学史  无限相思无限恨:石评梅作品集  快穿:我不可能是恋爱脑!  每天读点好英文:人生没有太晚的开始  中国文化与中国的兵  让我留在你的身边  茶席窥美  每天读点好英文:沉默的长夜  再不远行,就老了  鉴宝:让你鉴瓷,不是让你碰瓷  把沉睡的时光摇醒  我的世界很小,但是刚刚好  港综:从小弟到大佬  求你明恋我  道临异世界  再不远行,就老了2  每天读点好英文:我不爱这世界,我只爱你  每天读点好英文:这世界缺你不可  欲念闪婚,我被渣男小叔揽腰狂宠  叛逆的灵魂(纪伯伦全集)  

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