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第18部分（第1页）

you　have；　into　the　post　at　Lowton；　answers　must　be　addressed　to　J。E。；　at　the　post…office　there；　you　can　go　and　inquire　in　about　a　week　after　you　send　your　letter；　if　any　are　e；　and　act　accordingly。”

This　scheme　I　went　over　twice；　thrice；　it　was　then　digested　in　my　mind；　I　had　it　in　a　clear　practical　form：　I　felt　satisfied；　and　fell　asleep。

With　earliest　day；　I　was　up：　I　had　my　advertisement　written；　enclosed；　and　directed　before　the　bell　rang　to　rouse　the　school；　it　ran　thus：—

“A　young　lady　accustomed　to　tuition”　（had　I　not　been　a　teacher　two　years？）　“is　desirous　of　meeting　with　a　situation　in　a　private　family　where　the　children　are　under　fourteen　（I　thought　that　as　I　was　barely　eighteen；　it　would　not　do　to　undertake　the　guidance　of　pupils　nearer　my　own　age）。　She　is　qualified　to　teach　the　usual　branches　of　a　good　English　education；　together　with　French；　Drawing；　and　Music”　（in　those　days；　reader；　this　now　narrow　catalogue　of　acplishments；　would　have　been　held　tolerably　prehensive）。　“Address；　J。E。；　Post…office；　Lowton；—shire。”

This　document　remained　locked　in　my　drawer　all　day：　after　tea；　I　asked　leave　of　the　new　superintendent　to　go　to　Lowton；　in　order　to　perform　some　small　missions　for　myself　and　one　or　two　of　my　fellow…teachers；　permission　was　readily　granted；　I　went。　It　was　a　walk　of　two　miles；　and　the　evening　was　wet；　but　the　days　were　still　long；　I　visited　a　shop　or　two；　slipped　the　letter　into　the　post…　office；　and　came　back　through　heavy　rain；　with　streaming　garments；　but　with　a　relieved　heart。

The　succeeding　week　seemed　long：　it　came　to　an　end　at　last；　however；　like　all　sublunary　things；　and　once　more；　towards　the　close　of　a　pleasant　autumn　day；　I　found　myself　afoot　on　the　road　to　Lowton。　A　picturesque　track　it　was；　by　the　way；　lying　along　the　side　of　the　beck　and　through　the　sweetest　curves　of　the　dale：　but　that　day　I　thought　more　of　the　letters；　that　might　or　might　not　be　awaiting　me　at　the　little　burgh　whither　I　was　bound；　than　of　the　charms　of　lea　and　water。

My　ostensible　errand　on　this　occasion　was　to　get　measured　for　a　pair　of　shoes；　so　I　discharged　that　business　first；　and　when　it　was　done；　I　stepped　across　the　clean　and　quiet　little　street　from　the　shoemaker’s　to　the　post…office：　it　was　kept　by　an　old　dame；　who　wore　horn　spectacles　on　her　nose；　and　black　mittens　on　her　hands。

“Are　there　any　letters　for　J。E。？”　I　asked。

She　peered　at　me　over　her　spectacles；　and　then　she　opened　a　drawer　and　fumbled　among　its　contents　for　a　long　time；　so　long　that　my　hopes　began　to　falter。　At　last；　having　held　a　document　before　her　glasses　for　nearly　five　minutes；　she　presented　it　across　the　counter；　acpanying　the　act　by　another　inquisitive　and　mistrustful　glance—it　was　for　J。E。

“Is　there　only　one？”　I　demanded。

“There　are　no　more；”　said　she；　and　I　put　it　in　my　pocket　and　turned　my　face　homeward：　I　could　not　open　it　then；　rules　obliged　me　to　be　back　by　eight；　and　it　was　already　half…past　seven。

Various　duties　awaited　me　on　my　arrival。　I　had　to　sit　with　the　girls　during　their　hour　of　study；　then　it　was　my　turn　to　read　prayers；　to　see　them　to　bed：　afterwards　I　supped　with　the　other　teachers。　Even　when　we　finally　retired　for　the　night；　the　inevitable　Miss　Gryce　was　still　my　panion：　we　had　only　a　short　end　of　candle　in　our　candlestick；　and　I　dreaded　lest　she　should　talk　till　it　was　all　burnt　out；　fortunately；　however；　the　heavy　supper　she　had　eaten　produced　a　soporific　effect：　she　was　already　snoring　before　I　had　finished　undressing。　There　still　remained　an　inch　of　candle：　I　now　took　out　my　letter；　the　seal　was　an　initial　F。；　I　broke　it；　the　contents　were　brief。

“If　J。E。；　who　advertised　in　the—shire　Herald　of　last　Thursday；　possesses　the　acquirements　mentioned；　and　if　she　is　in　a　position　to　give　satisfactory　references　as　to　character　and　petency；　a　situation　can　be　offered　her　where　there　is　but　one　pupil；　a　little　girl；　under　ten　years　of　age；　and　where　the　salary　is　thirty　pounds　per　annum。　J。E。　is　requested　to　send　references；　name；　address；　and　all　particulars　to　the　direction：—

“Mrs。　Fairfax；　Thornfield；　near　Millcote；—shire。”

I　examined　the　document　long：　the　writing　was　old…fashioned　and　rather　uncertain；　like　that　of　in　elderly　lady。　This　circumstance　was　satisfactory：　a　private　fear　had　haunted　me；　that　in　thus　acting　for　myself；　and　by　my　own　guidance；　I　ran　the　risk　of　getting　into　some　scrape；　and；　above　all　things；　I　wished　the　result　of　my　endeavours　to　be　respectable；　proper；　en　règle。　I　now　felt　that　an　elderly　lady　was　no　bad　ingredient　in　the　business　I　had　on　hand。　Mrs。　Fairfax！　I　saw　her　in　a　black　gown　and　widow’s　cap；　frigid；　perhaps；　but　not　uncivil：　a　model　of　elderly　English　respectability。　Thornfield！　that；　doubtless；　was　the　name　of　her　house：　a　neat　orderly　spot；　I　was　sure；　though　I　failed　in　my　efforts　to　conceive　a　correct　plan　of　the　premises。　Millcote；　—　shire；　I　brushed　up　my　recollections　of　the　map　of　England；　yes；　I　saw　it；　both　the　shire　and　the　town。　—shire　was　seventy　miles　nearer　London　than　the　remote　county　where　I　now　resided：　that　was　a　remendation　to　me。　I　longed　to　go　where　there　was　life　and　movement：　Millcote　was　a　large　manufacturing　town　on　the　banks　of　the　A…；　a　busy　place　enough；　doubtless：　so　much　the　better；　it　would　be　a　plete　change　at　least。　Not　that　my　fancy　was　much　captivated　by　the　idea　of　long　chimneys　and　clouds　of　smoke—“but；”　I　argued；　“Thornfield　will；　probably；　be　a　good　way　from　the　town。”

Here　the　socket　of　the　candle　dropped；　and　the　wick　went　out。

Next　day　new　steps　were　to　be　taken；　my　plans　could　no　longer　be　confined　to　my　own　breast；　I　must　impart　them　in　order　to　achieve　their　success。　Having　sought　and　obtained　an　audience　of　the　superintendent　during　the　noontide　recreation；　I　told　her　I　had　a　prospect　of　getting　a　new　situation　where　the　salary　would　be　double　what　I　now　received　（for　at　Lowood　I　only　got　￡15　per　annum）；　and　requested　she　would　break　the　matter　for　me　to　Mr。　Brocklehurst；　or　some　of　the　mittee；　and　ascertain　whether　they　would　permit　me　to　mention　them　as　references。　She　obligingly　consented　to　act　as　mediatrix　in　the　matter。　The　next　day　she　laid　the　affair　before　Mr。　Brocklehurst；　who　said　that　Mrs。　Reed　must　be　written　to；　as　she　was　my　natural　guardian。　A　note　was　accordingly　addressed　to　that　lady；　who　returned　for　answer；　that　“I　might　do　as　I　pleased：　she　had　long　relinquished　all　interference　in　my　affairs。”　This　note　went　the　round　of　the　mittee；　and　at　last；　after　what　appeared　to　me　most　tedious　delay；　formal　leave　was　given　me　to　better　my　condition　if　I　could；　and　an　assurance　added；　that　as　I　had　always　conducted　myself　well；　both　as　teacher　and　pupil；　at　Lowood；　a　testimonial　of　character　and　capacity；　signed　by　the　inspectors　of　that　institution；　should　forthwith　be　furnished　me。

This　testimonial　I　accordingly　received　in　about　a　month；　forwarded　a　copy　of　it　to　Mrs。　Fairfax；　and　got　that　lady’s　reply；　stating　that　she　was　satisfied；　and　fixing　that　day　fortnight　as　the　period　for　my　assuming　the　post　of　governess　in　her　house。

I　now　busied　myself　in　preparations：　the　fortnight　passed　rapidly。　I　had　not　a　very　large　wardrobe；　though　it　y　wants；　and　the　last　day　sufficed　to　pack　my　trunk；—the　same　I　had　brought　with　me　eight　years　ago　from　Gateshead。

The　box　was　corded；　the　card　nailed　on。　In　half…an…hour　the　carrier　was　to　call　for　it　to　take　it　to　Lowton；　whether　I　myself　was　to　repair　at　an　early　hour　the　next　morning　to　meet　the　coach。　I　had　brushed　my　black　stuff　travelling…dress；　prepared　my　bon；　gloves；　and　muff；　sought　in　all　my　drawers　to　see　that　no　article　was　left　behind；　and　now　having　nothing　more　to　do；　I　sat　down　and　tried　to　rest。　I　could　not；　though　I　had　been　on　foot　all　day；　I　could　not　now　repose　an　instant；　I　was　too　much　excited。　A　phase　of　my　life　was　closing　to…night；　a　new　one　opening　to…morrow：　impossible　to　slumber　in　the　interval；　I　must　watch　feverishly　while　the　change　was　being　acplished。

“Miss；”　said　a　servant　who　met　me　in　the　lobby；　where　I　was　wandering　like　a　troubled　spirit；　“a　person　below　wishes　to　see　you。”

“The　carrier；　no　doubt；”　I　thought；　and　ran　downstairs　without　inquiry。　I　was　passing　the　back…parlour　or　teachers’　sitting…room；　the　door　of　which　was　half　open；　to　go　to　the　kitchen；　when　some　one　ran　out—

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